Who wears a wallet chain?!
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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