Kareoke will never be a sober sport
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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