I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
She needs sedatives and a leash
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
