My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize