Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Randomize
