found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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