Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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