Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
