theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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