Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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