My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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