Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i just had sex bonerless
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
