She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
