Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
