The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
