another moral hangover. fuck.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize