oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
