I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
NoShamevember. You game?
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
