at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
