There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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