apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
