I wanna passion pit in your ass
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
