The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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