Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
