my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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