i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Fuck appropriateness.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
