i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
