Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize