it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
