maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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