So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
3pm strippers are depressing
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
