we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
