Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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