Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
