p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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