i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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