Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
