I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
