I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
