strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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