so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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