I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize