We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Randomize
