Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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