Apparently you make a good broom.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
