My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize