Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize