I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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