i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
