i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
