I swear she didn't look like that last week.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
