I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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