The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
