Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
